Fast forward to February of this year. I heard from Polyface at the beginning of February that I had been selected to be an intern. When I heard, I immediately started praying HARD about whether or not to accept. I contacted all of my friends and had them pray too. The decision was not an easy one because I knew that without God’s intervention, going to Polyface would be impossible. I still had debt and expenses and other responsibilities, and from the world’s perspective, quitting my job for an internship was simply CRAZY. I wanted to make sure that it was God’s will that I leave my job, home, friends, etc. and go to Polyface. So, one Tuesday night smack-dab in the middle of my decision-making, I went to the women’s meeting at my church. The opening speaker talked about ideas and visions and that when we get ideas in life, or have dreams of accomplishing something, they can either be our own, or from God. She said if your idea/vision is something easy for you to accomplish on your own, then that idea is likely your own. But, if your idea is impossible for you to do on your own, and it seems crazy and you will fail without God’s intervention, then that idea is from God. God doesn’t call us to easy lives…to do easy things. He calls us to step out of our comfort zones and to get crazy for Him, to take God-ordained risks. He calls us to step into flooded, swollen, rushing rivers trusting He will stop the waters when we can’t actually see it with our eyes first. That struck a chord with me because leaving my life for Polyface, was impossible and scary.
A little later in the evening, I was talking to a dear friend Terri, about the decision and she told me a story about when she was making a major decision in her life. She said she asked God for a sign and He gave it to her. So that night, I went home to pray and ask God for guidance on whether or not to accept the internship. While praying, I asked Him for a sign. And just then the dream popped into my mind! I gasped and thought…June 1st...the due date…AND, the start date of the Polyface internship. I hadn’t thought of that dream in months and just when I asked God for a sign, I thought of it. It was clear to me that this was a sign from God and it helped me in the decision process.
Fast forward a few more months to May 31st. I had settled in at Polyface and was ready for my first day as an intern. On June 1st I woke up with a gasp and my roommate, Savannah, asked what it was. So I told her that I just had a dream that I was pregnant and going in to labor. In the dream, the baby had dropped and I was heading off to deliver. Interesting, huh? So, on the first day of the internship, God reassured me once again, that I was right where He wanted me. That He was indeed birthing something new in my life and it was starting with the internship at Polyface.
I have had yet another dream in the series and it came recently. Several weeks ago, the interns were asked to let the “bosses” know whether or not we were interested in being considered for the year-long apprenticeship. After prayer and contemplation, I decided to put my name in the hat for consideration. I asked the Lord to guide me according to His will and left it in His hands. Polyface selects two apprentices from the group of interns to stay on for an additional year. Four of us interns put our names in the hat. After expressing interest, we waited a week or two before we heard the final decision. It turns out they picked THREE apprentices for the 2012-2013 season, including me! The other two, Jonathan and Ben, are lovely young men and I look forward to working with them. Polyface has never had a female apprentice before, and it is an honor to be the first.
A few days after I found out that I had been selected. I dreamt that I had the baby. Her name was Sarah Grace and my mom was there to cut the umbilical cord. I have asked God to reveal to me what it all means, but it seems like it is another reassurance that I am where He wants me to be…that this apprenticeship (and farming in general) is the new thing He has given me. Because of the specific baby name, I spent a little time reading about Sarah and Abraham in the bible and about how God blessed them in their old age with a baby. I’m not saying I’m old, but I am 15 years older than the other apprentices. ;-) There are a few other potentially interesting meanings hidden in this dream, but I am continuing to seek God to reveal them to me.
So, as I mentioned before, I believe God speaks to us in dreams. I don’t know that all dreams are from God, but when I have a particularly vivid or detailed dream, I ask Him two questions: is it from Him and if so, what does it mean?
Before two weeks ago, I did not know what I would be doing come October (the end of the internship). And the funny thing is, I had peace about it. God knew His plans for me, and blessed me with peace, even though I did not know. Praise God. As far as provision, God has been faithful. He has provided me with everything I need and more, so far, and I know He will continue. Although I will be getting paid more for the apprenticeship, my financial situation is still impossible without God’s intervention. I am not terribly comfortable with this, but I am starting my fundraising campaign again. I could use some financial assistance, so if anybody happens to feel led to donate, there is a “donate” button on the right side of this blog. If not, I would very much appreciate your continued prayers and support in any way. Thanks and love to all.